maybe a hint of regret

months ago i asked fruit for **'s facebook page but i could never find it, till this morning i just somehow stumbled upon it.

i think i consciously keep certain memories from coming back, and im happy to let it stay that way unless i really have to take something out again - but only for building someone else up.

yeah i suppose there's regret, i'd be lying to say there isn't. and as much as i try to think i've completely forgiven, i think there are still feelings of contempt and disgust. well.. actually, are those feelings mutually exclusive with forgivness? now i wish i could sit here typing for a bit more, but i've got a lecture to attend.

it's funny how i think a lot of why im uncomfortable with c's relationship stems from mine with **. i'd just hate for her to get what i got. maybe i just feel insecure for her? don't know.